The Daily Kanga

What in the blue balled monkey hell?

Are you kidding me?

David Beckham... leaving Real Madrid? Yeh. I would too, for $27.5 Million for five years. 

My utter gods!  His contract ends in June. I'll be in England in June. Damn it! Anyway... at least it's good for the MLS.

GODS! I miss my English Football!!!!!!

Oh.. but wait.. what's this?
The World Cup returns to the United States.

At least the time difference will be manageable, I never stop being on EST.

I soooo miss the footie. The grace and style, the pure footwork art form. I miss jumping up and down on the couch, holding my head, reliving the instant replays, 'ALRIGHT!' or turning my head away when it's an own goal or someone else's goal, 'YOU TWAT!'
*sighs* Oh, how I miss the footie!

I wonder. And why leave behind two suicide notes?

 Caption: Two symbols of English sporting failures.

 Have an England flag? Not sure what to do with it? Well, below is a list of what to do with your England Flag:

  1. Use them to dry your eyes. Despite most flags being made from synthetic materials, typically woven polyester, some of them can be absorbent enough for your most lachrymose moments.

2. Continue to display your England flag with pride (part I). If anybody asks, point out England are still in the competition, Saturday was all just a bad dream, lightning never strikes so many times, it's going to be an England v Germany final. Place hands over ears and repeat "naa naa naa, I can't hear you".

3. If you're a Sun reader you could consider using the flags as stuffing for an effigy of the newly-crowned "least popular man in the Premiership" Cristiano Ronaldo. Don't burn it though as some polyester can give off pollutants.

4. Recycle it. Some polyester fibre can be recycled effectively.

5. Return them to China. They made them.

6. If you know anyone who's a dab hand with a sewing machine why not consider turning the flags into clothing and shipping them out to developing countries.

7. Bleach flag, convert into cross of St Andrew, get behind Andrew Murray. There isn't a single French, German, Portuguese or Italian player left in the men's singles at Wimbledon. So frankly, who cares about the World Cup.

8. Continue to display your England flag with pride (part II). England kick off the World Lacrosse championships on 14 July. Best of all the tournament is being held in London (Ontario). Come on England.

9. Try and get a refund or exchange. The Trade Descriptions Act 1968 makes it an offence for a trader to knowingly or recklessly make such statements about misleading services. Any flag trader who suggested England enjoyed a vague chance of actually winning the thing should surely feel obliged to offer you at least a France flag in exchange.

10. Save them for next time. Euro 2008 is in Switzerland and Austria. With David Beckham likely to head off to spend more time with his hair, England might really have a chance of winning. There's only 705 days to go.

Original content.

 Shoot with balls, not guns!

 I thought this article was entertaining.

But, when I got down to this bit:

  "On the streets they may shout "Death to America", but on the court they cheer for American basketball players"

I thought that was a bit disturbing:/

Feel free to leave comments.

We thought it was all over, but with four mins in the game remaining Owen, gives a truely wonder header, brining a second equaliser!

Bring on the World Cup!

I was at work during the match; however, G recorded the game for me and I fully enjoyed watching it!